Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Pour Out a Little Liquor: Gingrich Edition

Last week, Ol' Big Noggin Gingrich teased the American public with a promise that he would end this ridiculous joke, also know as, his run for the presidency.

My first reaction to the news of his suspension was, "Wait! How the fuck am I going to get my $2.50/gallon gas?

Dammit. I guess that means I'm back to siphoning it out of cars in the Walmart parking lot.

But then I remembered that the promise to cut gas prices was coming from a bloated, delusional megalomaniac, who has a better chance of riding a magical unicorn to Neverland than landing in the Oval Office.

Then I just wanted to know why this asshole was sending out "save the dates" instead of just pulling the plug on his ailing spouse... err, I mean campaign.

To answer that question, many news outlets are reporting that Gingrich wanted to treat his last week on the campaign trail as a sort of "farewell tour." Shaking hands, throwing out the first pitch at baseball games, going to fairs and having carnies guess the weight of his head. You know, fun stuff.

But all good things must come to an end, and today Gingrich released a video letting his supporters-- and those of us that are sane-- know that he will officially drop out of the race Wednesday.

It's the end of an era, guys. A really stupid era.

1 comment:

MonsteRawr said...

Damnit. There go my dreams of living on the moon.