I wish I could say people are finding this post because they're looking for a mocking commentary on the women's magazine, but that is just not the case. This piece is popular because when people type a certain phrase into Google, my blog pops up. That phrase is... How To Sext.
When I first wrote about sexting, I had no idea people were so eager to learn the art cellular seduction, but now I feel that it's my duty as an unqualified sex advisor to give the people what they want.
- Arousing visuals are important when it comes to sexting (just ask any congressman/actor/athlete). But that does not mean that great sexting should be all tits and flaccid penises, sometimes a sexy little prop does the trick.
|Poorly written erotica doesn't count.|
- Although, it is very important to let your sexting partner know exactly what's waiting for them. Enter the grainy, self-photo of your genitals. Yowza!
|Remember to play up your best assets.|
- Okay, forget pictures... Sexting really is all about the naughty details. A great sexter is a champion at tantalizing their partner with some mind-blowing word play.
- If all this stuff seems pretty novice, then maybe you are a big-league sexter. For these pros I would suggest implementing a little fantasy in your sexting. It's like virtual roleplaying.
|Maybe sexy librarian would be a better choice.|
- And if all else fails, remember, nothing says "Fuck me like I'm paying your rent" more than an EMOJI! 8====D~~~ ( ;
|And they lived happily ever after.|
Suck on that, Cosmo!