This will be my 100th post.
And like Marcus Bachmann when faced with vaginal intercourse, I cannot perform.
I've been racking my brain trying to think of a way to celebrate this big, round blog-posting number, but alas, I was left staring at a blank screen wondering if the woman from "19 Kids and Counting" delivered each one of those little munchkins vaginally.
Then I was thinking that if she did, it is a miracle the baby juice can even stay in that black-hole long enough to bring another one of her miracles into this world.
Then I was thinking, one of those kids has be gay. It's just numbers.
I was also thinking, one of those kids will probably end up being a serial killer. Still, it's just numbers.
Then I turned off TLC and decided to never have children.
I wish I had something more though. Words that could fully express my gratitude that even one person decided to read my internet ramblings. Especially, because I think you guys are smart and funny, and I would love to buy you all drinks and touch you inappropriately once the alcohol took hold.
So if any of you guys are ever in Northeast Florida...
Anyways, thank you to everyone who has ever read I'm Not Really a Barista. I think you are all incredible.
Even if a couple of you are probably serial killers. Once again, it's just numbers.
No big deal.