Tuesday, September 6, 2011

I Love a Jihad Against Rick Santorum

Jihad means holy war? I thought it
meant sweaty, anal sex party. Nevermind.
Recently, uber-douchebag, bigot, and presidential-hopeful Rick Santorum said that the LGBT community has "gone out on a jihad" against him. Santorum believes that because Dan Savage and his readers have made his name synonymous with a by-product of anal sex, the gay community has gone all holy war on him.

Sure, Santorum compared homosexuality to bestiality and gay marriage to a napkin, but what's the big deal. Napkins are useful and my dog just got anally finger-banged by his groomer. Chill out.

So, I'm here to tell Mr. Santorum that I'm behind him 100 percent ... with a strap-on and a bottle of Astroglide ready to create a frothy, frothy mix.

Santorum 2012. Fuck yeah.
at

7 comments:

  1. MaxwellSeptember 6, 2011 at 11:17 PM

    I think this is inappropriate and unethical for you to say. Frankly, I'm disgusted by this post.

    You made no mention of covering the strap-on with razor blades. That would make him a lock in the red states. Shame on you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AllieSeptember 7, 2011 at 12:06 AM

    Dammit, I knew I was leaving something out.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Heather Rose September 7, 2011 at 10:00 AM

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2FnP7QqWamA

    Now Dan Savage is going after Santorum's first name ... Dan Savage is my hero.

    ReplyDelete
  4. AllieSeptember 7, 2011 at 10:27 AM

    Lmao, Heather. I saw that. I'm slightly obsessed with Dan Savage!

    ReplyDelete
  5. ShaneiferdSeptember 8, 2011 at 12:38 PM

    Yeah...I'm from Pennsylvania and most of us aren't exactly proud of Rick Santorum. He gives the rest of us a bad name. On the other hand, at least our name isn't synonymous with lube-covered shit. So in the end we get the better deal...pun completely intended.

    ~SP

    ReplyDelete
  6. AllieSeptember 8, 2011 at 1:54 PM

    Shane- I kinda love you!

    ReplyDelete
  7. ShaneiferdSeptember 13, 2011 at 9:11 AM

    Haha, I'm just kind of a bastard sometimes :D

    ReplyDelete

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